Byeeeeeeeeee Ireland ='(

I've been back in the USA for about two weeks now, and I'm glad to be back. But I thought I'd give Dublin/Ireland/Europe a last shout out. While being abroad made me appreciate how great my life is in America, there are definitely things I'll miss. I realized this when I landed in JFK ariport and had to get home via the NYC subway and NJ Transit train....and remembered that Americans are not nice. At all. I miss Irish people!

Anyway, spending the semester abroad was a really fun experience, and I learned a lot about other countries' outlooks on education and general societal conduct (I've seen more people pee in public on the streets of Dublin than anyone should ever have to...which is why I now instinctively step over wet spots on sidewalks regardless of whether or not it just rained).

As a final farewell, I would like to forever mark upon the internet the most important quotes/jokes/random nonsense that made my time overseas extra memorable (or in some cases, not memorable in the slightest). And I dedicate this post to the fabulous people I met in Ireland. It would've been shit craic without y'all!

1. NBD.
2. Definitely, like, 30 out of 10.
3. Party Foul!
4. I can't...see....
5. I'm going to fight you.
6. *fist pumping*
7. Fioooooooooonaaaaaaaaaa!
8. Love Juice.

I BEEN AMSTERJAMMIN.

I recently survived another BALLIN trip with Papa Joe. To Amsterdam (because it would be an absolute disgrace to live in Europe for 5 months and NOT go to Amsterdam).

The city in a nutshell: gorgeous. As in the houses are pretty. And the canals. And the weather. And all the people who live there (tall, blonde, tan, Vikings). Everything was laid back too, which, as an American, I was completely unaccustomed to. Take restaurants, for instance. Is there one eating establishment in the USA where the employees aren't trying to get you fed and then get you the hell out? I'm pretty sure I've actually had to wrestle my plate out of a server's hands because I was still eating when they were trying to take away my plate (that may be an exaggeration, can't be sure though). Well, in the Netherlands...it's the opposite. Fun fact for the tourist: DO NOT GO TO A RESTAURANT IN A FAMISHED STATE. You will be crying with starvation an hour later when your food has not arrived. You will also cry when your food comes out and it's a normal European sized serving and not a fat steroid American sized portion. And you'll cry even more when your waiter never comes back to refill your tiny ass water glass (that you had to pay 2 quid for because they only serve bottled water and not tap water).

Ok, that totally seemed like an ethnocentric whiny bitch rant. It was. I admit it. I'm at the point where I can appreciate how other countries do things, but I miss America. I'm over the European exoticness. I want a cheese steak and a sweet tea (and my family too...I guess (jk love y'all)).

Back to Amsterdam.

I was very pleased with the amount of walking and touristy things that we did. The best was the Van Gogh Museum. Dude was crazy, but the crazy ones make the best art. And when we saw the Rijks Museum, I felt very pleased with myself for recognizing the works Rembrandt and Rubens that I learned about in my art history class (I guess I did learn some stuff at UCD - all is not lost).

And what trip is complete without a pub crawl and a trip down to the Red Light District? Not ours! The pub crawl was ok. Kept my vision the whole time. Broke my flip-flops though. And some dude named Fabio (no, really) may have been trying to make me his wife because he thought I was Persian...but I could be wrong. The Red Light District was horribly depressing at first. We got there early, while it was still light out. The day shift girls were on duty, and they were the saddest things I've ever seen. Bored. On their phones. And...well...not pretty at all. We went for dinner and returned later, like around 9, and the difference was hilarious. Sketchy bros were going in and out of those little glass doors, and the night shift girls (the hot ones) were on...very few of them were on their phones. It's a fun experience. I felt awful laughing, but it's hard to walk past a girl in glow-in-the-dark animal print underwear beckoning you and not laugh. Oh Amsterdam.

Smug American Observations on Redcoat Land

1. The British Pound looks more like monopoly money than any other currency I have ever seen. And WHY THE HELL is the 2 pence coin as big as my palm while all the other ones are tiny???
2. Pubs in the town of Oxford close at like 11 or 12. They close at like 2 or 3 in Dublin. Which is probably a factor in why it took so long for Ireland to become free and get their shit together...
3. The Great Hall scenes in Harry Potter were filmed in Christ Church College, Oxford. I was terribly disappointed by the real thing.
4. They say "Botanic Gardens" instead of "botanical gardens." This also upset me for some odd reason.
5. All the important landmarks in London (Big Ben, London Eye, ect) are right next to each other (this made my picture taking life SO much easier).
6. The British Museum has pamphlets arguing why they should be allowed to keep all of the artifacts that they stole/illegitimately purchased from Greece (which is questionable and bitchy, but it's still the best museum ever).
7. It is impossible to get free rides on public transportation in London. America could've used help in that department. Maybe SEPTA would stop raising fares so much...

Dublinfest

So like three months ago when I didn't have any work to do, I played in a lacrosse tournament. Just kidding. It was like two weeks ago. Dublinfest is a tournament hosted by the Dublin lacrosse teams (surprise!) and teams come from places all over Ireland, England, and Scotland. By teams I mean mostly men's teams. There were only 4 women's teams in the tournament, so this will be a pretty quick one.

So we had 6 games to be played over two days. Our first was against a team from Aberdeen. The uniforms they ordered hadn't arrived yet. Logically, their first instinct was for all of them to dress up as Waldo...like from Where's Waldo? It seems like a clever idea right? You know, lull us into a false sense of security. It's pretty hard to take a team seriously when they look ridiculous. But we still won. Next game was against the Manchester team. Anyone who knows me is probably aware that I like to take lacrosse somewhat seriously, and I'm a fairly competitive person...but man those were the meanest bitches I've played against in my life. I wasn't angry that they beat us. I was angry that one of those steroid British freaks intentionally slashed me in the head with her stick. Needless to say they were the least popular team in the tournament...

Anyway, last game was against Leeds, who were good at lacrosse (we didn't even score on them. oops.) and fairly classy, which was nice. Day 2 was more fun. We started off against Aberdeen again. They got their uniforms. They were bright purple. And all the names on the backs were Harry Potter characters. Scottish people are my favorite (excuse me, *favourite*).

It gets better. Remember those nasty Manchester manladies? Well we were pretty fired up (we beat Aberdeen again), and we wanted to crush their spirit. Guess who beat those fools? YEAH UCD YEAH! (They were really disgusted and pitiful afterwards because we're really not that good a team and they had won the tournament the previous two years...hahaha). NBD.

Unfortunately, after expending all of our energy on defeating the evil people, and losing some players (people just left and went home after Manchester...it was that big a deal), we had nothing left to play against Leeds again. So we played for like 10 minutes and then forfeited. Usually this would upset me because I think quitting & giving up in general is SAD, but I really can't even acceptably express how pleased I was to mindf*** Manchester.

Tournament results: UCD 3rd place. Out of 4. Better than losing (sorry Aberdeen).

What am I doing here?

Don't get me wrong, I've actually been really busy here for the past few weeks. It's just my personal opinion that what's been keeping me busy are things that would most likely not be of any interest to anyone else. But, as it's been a while since my last update (and, as I don't want to leave my favorite stalkers hanging for fear of a Misery style punishment), I will document things.

School work: Yeah, believe it or not, I've actually had to do work. I guess the way it works over here is the profs like to lull people into a false sense of security, during which many stop attending lectures...or doing readings...or handing in assignments...and then they pile on the workload and terrify everyone into studying again by giving sample material to prepare for exams (during which many realize that they have no idea what's going on in the class or what their prof's name is...). Don't worry, I'm too much of a nerd to be one of these people.

Weather: Did you know that Ireland actually does receive sunlight? With the amount of fake tan I've seen since being here, I didn't believe it, but it actually gets WARM and SUNNY here. Like the past 2-3 weeks, I've actually been able to go outside a few times without a coat on, and wear SUNGLASSES, and even SHORTS. I was afraid that being out of Philly meant that I would miss the proper smell of spring and those random days where it hits 70 degrees and suddenly everyone is lying on College Green in bikinis. And yeah, it's not quite the same here (because the second a cloud moves over the sun, you start to get the chills), but it's close enough.

Lacrosse: So this past Friday and Saturday, the UCD women's lacrosse team had informal matches. These matches included a mix of players from Dublin, Belfast, Galway, and other places which I don't remember. What you should know about this is that these random players, and about a third of the UCD team are on the Irish Development team...meaning they're going to be representing Ireland in the Women's Lacrosse WORLD CUP. As the cocky American that I am, I figured that this Irish team would probably be a bit of a joke in comparison to teams I've seen back home. NEWS UPDATE: They're actually really good and beat the American team a few years ago...

So the way the teams were split up, it was the National Irish Team versus everyone else (so they could practice playing together with the new players who just made the squad). Sadly for me, I was on the everyone else team. As in the team on which the players run the wrong direction of the goal. And can't catch. Or throw. Or pick up the ball off the ground once they've missed the catch or dropped the throw. Needless to say, we were massacred. Even though I wanted to yell at everyone at half time, it was still fun(ish).

This week we have a three day long tournament called Dublinfest, which means we miss class and play three games a day on Tuesday and Wednesday, and the winning teams from those games play in a final match on Thursday. I think we have a shot, especially since we won't be losing 99% of our GOOD players to the Irish Team.

Social life: I take it from the conversation I had with my grandmother just an hour ago that it's possible that there's some gossip in this department. "This department" specifically being my (I actually cringe a little when I hear these words) "love life." Yes, I am now dating an Irish boy. His name is Jason. He's on the guy's lacrosse team, which is how I met him. He is very nice. And he has won the love of my roommates by bringing an Xbox to our apartment. Don't worry, I told him I would only marry him if there is a shooting star directly behind him when he proposes.

Stay tuned for the Dublinfest update...and next weekend's trip to LDN!

How Protestant Countries Do Things.

Part 1: Belfast

Yes, Northern Ireland is a different country than The Republic of Ireland. Which means four things:

1. They are part of the UK and not the EU. So...they're loyal to British monarchs.
2. Since they're not part of the EU, I had to use pounds instead of euros as currency. So...no matter how low any prices looked, my American dollar was even more WORTHLESS.
3. Since they're loyal to British monarchs, the majority of the population is Protestant. So...there's kind of a beef between them and the Catholics.
4. Their accents are really impossible to understand once you're used to the Dublin accent.

Anyway, from what I understand, Belfast is a really nice city. However, I was there for a weekend with the lacrosse team, so all I actually saw was the bus station, the hostel where we stayed, a lacrosse field, and a few pubs. Ooooops.

It was fun though. A lot of bonding. A full Saturday of lacrosse from 10am - 3:30pm. After which many libations were poured, served, and consumed. It was grand.

Part 2: Edinburgh

The great thing about Scotland is that it's only an hour long flight from the Dublin airport. The sad thing about the Dublin airport is RyanAir airlines. Which are cheap. Though only at ungodly hours of the morning like 6:25am. This being the situation, my roommate/wingman/protective brother Joe and I decided to stay awake to wait for our 4am cab instead of go to bed and wake up at 4am. We did this by eating a normal dinner, taking a nap, and waking up at midnight to eat another round of dinner. I still don't know how we're not fat...

Anyway, our flight out went well, and we landed in Scotland, which had a warm friendly welcoming layer of icy snow on the ground. Awesome. Luckily, when we got into town where our hostel was, there wasn't anymore snow. But it was nippy. It reminded me of home (sigh). Unfortunately, check-in at Budget Backpackers Hostel (hahaha....story of my life) wasn't until five hours after we had arrived. So after having mild heart attacks, we ate some hostel breakfast (by that I mean we ate 5 croissants each) and ventured out to do touristy things (take pictures of landmarks to prove to our mothers that we did something in Europe besides drink).

We hit up Edinburgh's #1 attraction, the castle. It was expensive, but really worth it. The castle itself was architecturally impressive and the view of the city from the top was amazing (see pictures - I hate describing things). We even spent the extra 3 pounds for the audio tour, which was actually pretty nice. The castle also has the Scottish National War Museum (I could be making that name up) inside it, and the Scottish Crown Jewels were on display in the castle as well. I wish I was allowed to take pictures, but I wasn't, so I guess I'll have to describe those. Basically, just picture a sword so big that if you held it above your head for a minute, your arm would be useless to you for the rest of the week. And there was a crown encrusted with gems and pearls. And there was a scepter which was really small (because all your focus has to be on holding that ridiculous sword). And there was a rock. No, I'm not kidding, it's called the Stone of Destiny. It's been used at all the Scottish (and then British for obvious reasons...) coronations since at least 1057. Apparently medieval people thought the rock had Biblical significance, and why not just keep pretending and carrying on the tradition, right?

After admiring these "Honours of Scotland," we left the castle and walked a bit down the Royal Mile, which leads down to the palace. Things we noticed while walking this chunk of mile:

• A really pretty cathedral that had been turned into a cafe...I didn't realize how Catholic I was until I found myself mildly offended (it was Ash Wednesday, and I didn't sleep. I was cranky and not in Dublin anymore).
• A lot of stores with cashmere. I guess I'm a savage because I really had no idea that was like, a Scottish thing.
• The Elephant House Cafe, where J.K. Rowling wrote Harry Potter (well...this one was just off the road, but I'm still counting it).

When we got to the point of whiny bitch exhaustion, we stopped at a Subway, hid our shameful American food in our jackets, and returned to the hostel. Still an hour too early to check-in. So after eating our shameful American food in the public space of the kitchen (and falling asleep with our heads on the table), we were finally able to get into our room. Where we slept until 6pm. FIVE HOUR NAP FTW.

After a classy dinner of frozen pizza and garlic bread from the convenience store (all a total of 5 pounds, so complete SHIT), we joined a group from our hostel for a pub crawl. I will not discuss the pub crawl....mostly because I don't really remember any of it. But I do know the drinkage was cheap because I still had money when I woke up the next day!

Like the Cork City pub crawl in Ireland, the Budget Backpackers Edinburgh pub crawl did not help me want to wake up and go sight-seeing. Actually, we slept until 3 the next day. Oooops again. But we were able to get out, drink smoothies, and check out the cemetery and the palace at the end of the Royal Mile, the queen's official residence when she stays in Scotland. As goes the story of my life (again), the palace was closed by the time we got there. But I saw some of the outside of it...(sorry Momatron).

The touristy highlight of this day was dinner. We dove in and tried the haggis, which actually doesn't look scary at all, and tastes better than it looks. I found it a satisfying meal, but to be honest, I really would not go out of my way to eat it again (I know, shameful American). After dinner, we once again joined the group for the pub crawl. Despite our pact to take it easy this time, we both ended up even worse off than the previous night. I guess the people we were with either found us very lovable or the drinks were just DIRT cheap, because people just kept buying us shots...rumor has it that at some point on the walk in between bars, I started screaming "GUYS I CAN'T SEE ANYMORE." But I don't remember that so I bet it's not true.

Anyway, we survived the night (by this I mean I didn't get arrested or try to fight anyone, and Joe did not get killed as a result of me trying to fight anyone) and by some strange voodoo we made it back to the hostel (I'm pretty sure God did not want to be involved in that sloppiness).

The next day was the day from HELL (see, I told you God had NO PART IN THIS). We made it to the airport in good time for our 12:40pm flight, and then got delayed FIVE HOURS because of "technical issues." Word to the wise - no matter how cheap they are, don't fly with RyanAir. I am telling you from personal experience, and the grumblings of the other veteran passengers, IT IS NOT WORTH IT.

We did eventually get back to Dublin. I missed Ireland. But I can't lie, Edinburgh knows how to get the craic on.

Drummylicious Visit

This past weekend, I had the wonderful joy of hosting a visit from my fabulous friend, Caitlin, who came from London. There was plenty of craic to go around, which was good because I finally have work now at UCD, and I needed a nice weekend. I actually had to turn in two essays this past week, and I've got two more due this week. Let me take a brief moment to just share some things my professors have taught me about essay-writing here:

• You are not supposed to plagiarize.
• You are supposed to have a thesis statement, topic sentences, and quotes from the text as evidence of your point.
• Essays will be accepted until two weeks after the due date has passed (at a loss of half a grade a day).

I do not consider myself to be a snob, or a particularly judgmental human being, but HONESTLY. Back at Penn, if you hand in you essay two HOURS after the deadline, good luck trying to get a professor to accept it. No, no, wait. two MINUTES with some profs I've had. Two weeks? REALLY? Don't even get me started on the thesis thing.

Ok, English major rant over. Back to my weekend.

So on Friday night, Caitlin met my friends and we all happily feasted at the apartment. I then gave her some cultural education (by this I mean taught her Irish slang and made her listen to what in my opinion should be the Irish National Anthem. Here's the link, but don't listen if you're in public unless you have headphones http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ljPFZrRD3J8). After I finished mentally preparing Caitlin, we all went out in a group to Purty Kitchen, a poorly named nightclub. It was a bit dead since a lot of Irish people went home to their non-Dublin counties to vote (I hope since the elections are over people will take down the posters of the politician who looks like Mr. Burns from the Simpsons...), but we were rolling 11 playas deep, so we brought the party anyway.

On Saturday, Caitlin and I took the bus into city center and then walked like 23985739451934 miles to the Guinness Storehouse, which despite being an iconic Dublin landmark, is way off in a shady ugly area of the city. It was grand though, I now know a lot more than I really need to know about Guinness. I must, however, share my favorite fun fact. Arthur Guinness, the founder of the brewery, fought off cops with a pickax to defend his somewhat illegally obtained water supply (which is not, like people say, from the River Liffey, but from the Wicklow Mountain springs). Apparently it worked out pretty well for him...

Though the nicest part of the storehouse is actually the Gravity Bar at the very top. No, it's not what you think, I don't say that because of the beer, but because it shows a 360 degree panoramic view of Dublin. It just so happened that the sun shone ALL DAY, so it was absolutely magnificent.

Anyway, after enjoying our tour/Guinness drinking, we walked around the city a bit. I gave Caitlin some more cultural orientation by taking her to Supermac's, which is the Irish version of McDonald's. They really like to advertise the fact that their beef is 100% Irish. Like, they REALLY want you to know it's not that crap with mad cow disease.

When we finally admitted defeat to exhaustion, we returned to UCD for another home-cooked dinner. And then went out to Porterhouse, a reputable pub. Unfortunately, grenades were exploding everywhere (if you don't understand, watch the Jersey Shore and EDUCATE yourself), and the house beer (which was cheapest) was quite foul. And I can put up with a lot of rubbish, believe me. Luckily, we still had a nice large crowd so all was not lost. We got home, ate an unnecessary amount of food, and went to bed.

Great weekend, now back to work =( Good thing spring break is THIS COMING WEEKEND!!!