Byeeeeeeeeee Ireland ='(

I've been back in the USA for about two weeks now, and I'm glad to be back. But I thought I'd give Dublin/Ireland/Europe a last shout out. While being abroad made me appreciate how great my life is in America, there are definitely things I'll miss. I realized this when I landed in JFK ariport and had to get home via the NYC subway and NJ Transit train....and remembered that Americans are not nice. At all. I miss Irish people!

Anyway, spending the semester abroad was a really fun experience, and I learned a lot about other countries' outlooks on education and general societal conduct (I've seen more people pee in public on the streets of Dublin than anyone should ever have to...which is why I now instinctively step over wet spots on sidewalks regardless of whether or not it just rained).

As a final farewell, I would like to forever mark upon the internet the most important quotes/jokes/random nonsense that made my time overseas extra memorable (or in some cases, not memorable in the slightest). And I dedicate this post to the fabulous people I met in Ireland. It would've been shit craic without y'all!

1. NBD.
2. Definitely, like, 30 out of 10.
3. Party Foul!
4. I can't...see....
5. I'm going to fight you.
6. *fist pumping*
7. Fioooooooooonaaaaaaaaaa!
8. Love Juice.

I BEEN AMSTERJAMMIN.

I recently survived another BALLIN trip with Papa Joe. To Amsterdam (because it would be an absolute disgrace to live in Europe for 5 months and NOT go to Amsterdam).

The city in a nutshell: gorgeous. As in the houses are pretty. And the canals. And the weather. And all the people who live there (tall, blonde, tan, Vikings). Everything was laid back too, which, as an American, I was completely unaccustomed to. Take restaurants, for instance. Is there one eating establishment in the USA where the employees aren't trying to get you fed and then get you the hell out? I'm pretty sure I've actually had to wrestle my plate out of a server's hands because I was still eating when they were trying to take away my plate (that may be an exaggeration, can't be sure though). Well, in the Netherlands...it's the opposite. Fun fact for the tourist: DO NOT GO TO A RESTAURANT IN A FAMISHED STATE. You will be crying with starvation an hour later when your food has not arrived. You will also cry when your food comes out and it's a normal European sized serving and not a fat steroid American sized portion. And you'll cry even more when your waiter never comes back to refill your tiny ass water glass (that you had to pay 2 quid for because they only serve bottled water and not tap water).

Ok, that totally seemed like an ethnocentric whiny bitch rant. It was. I admit it. I'm at the point where I can appreciate how other countries do things, but I miss America. I'm over the European exoticness. I want a cheese steak and a sweet tea (and my family too...I guess (jk love y'all)).

Back to Amsterdam.

I was very pleased with the amount of walking and touristy things that we did. The best was the Van Gogh Museum. Dude was crazy, but the crazy ones make the best art. And when we saw the Rijks Museum, I felt very pleased with myself for recognizing the works Rembrandt and Rubens that I learned about in my art history class (I guess I did learn some stuff at UCD - all is not lost).

And what trip is complete without a pub crawl and a trip down to the Red Light District? Not ours! The pub crawl was ok. Kept my vision the whole time. Broke my flip-flops though. And some dude named Fabio (no, really) may have been trying to make me his wife because he thought I was Persian...but I could be wrong. The Red Light District was horribly depressing at first. We got there early, while it was still light out. The day shift girls were on duty, and they were the saddest things I've ever seen. Bored. On their phones. And...well...not pretty at all. We went for dinner and returned later, like around 9, and the difference was hilarious. Sketchy bros were going in and out of those little glass doors, and the night shift girls (the hot ones) were on...very few of them were on their phones. It's a fun experience. I felt awful laughing, but it's hard to walk past a girl in glow-in-the-dark animal print underwear beckoning you and not laugh. Oh Amsterdam.

Smug American Observations on Redcoat Land

1. The British Pound looks more like monopoly money than any other currency I have ever seen. And WHY THE HELL is the 2 pence coin as big as my palm while all the other ones are tiny???
2. Pubs in the town of Oxford close at like 11 or 12. They close at like 2 or 3 in Dublin. Which is probably a factor in why it took so long for Ireland to become free and get their shit together...
3. The Great Hall scenes in Harry Potter were filmed in Christ Church College, Oxford. I was terribly disappointed by the real thing.
4. They say "Botanic Gardens" instead of "botanical gardens." This also upset me for some odd reason.
5. All the important landmarks in London (Big Ben, London Eye, ect) are right next to each other (this made my picture taking life SO much easier).
6. The British Museum has pamphlets arguing why they should be allowed to keep all of the artifacts that they stole/illegitimately purchased from Greece (which is questionable and bitchy, but it's still the best museum ever).
7. It is impossible to get free rides on public transportation in London. America could've used help in that department. Maybe SEPTA would stop raising fares so much...

Dublinfest

So like three months ago when I didn't have any work to do, I played in a lacrosse tournament. Just kidding. It was like two weeks ago. Dublinfest is a tournament hosted by the Dublin lacrosse teams (surprise!) and teams come from places all over Ireland, England, and Scotland. By teams I mean mostly men's teams. There were only 4 women's teams in the tournament, so this will be a pretty quick one.

So we had 6 games to be played over two days. Our first was against a team from Aberdeen. The uniforms they ordered hadn't arrived yet. Logically, their first instinct was for all of them to dress up as Waldo...like from Where's Waldo? It seems like a clever idea right? You know, lull us into a false sense of security. It's pretty hard to take a team seriously when they look ridiculous. But we still won. Next game was against the Manchester team. Anyone who knows me is probably aware that I like to take lacrosse somewhat seriously, and I'm a fairly competitive person...but man those were the meanest bitches I've played against in my life. I wasn't angry that they beat us. I was angry that one of those steroid British freaks intentionally slashed me in the head with her stick. Needless to say they were the least popular team in the tournament...

Anyway, last game was against Leeds, who were good at lacrosse (we didn't even score on them. oops.) and fairly classy, which was nice. Day 2 was more fun. We started off against Aberdeen again. They got their uniforms. They were bright purple. And all the names on the backs were Harry Potter characters. Scottish people are my favorite (excuse me, *favourite*).

It gets better. Remember those nasty Manchester manladies? Well we were pretty fired up (we beat Aberdeen again), and we wanted to crush their spirit. Guess who beat those fools? YEAH UCD YEAH! (They were really disgusted and pitiful afterwards because we're really not that good a team and they had won the tournament the previous two years...hahaha). NBD.

Unfortunately, after expending all of our energy on defeating the evil people, and losing some players (people just left and went home after Manchester...it was that big a deal), we had nothing left to play against Leeds again. So we played for like 10 minutes and then forfeited. Usually this would upset me because I think quitting & giving up in general is SAD, but I really can't even acceptably express how pleased I was to mindf*** Manchester.

Tournament results: UCD 3rd place. Out of 4. Better than losing (sorry Aberdeen).

What am I doing here?

Don't get me wrong, I've actually been really busy here for the past few weeks. It's just my personal opinion that what's been keeping me busy are things that would most likely not be of any interest to anyone else. But, as it's been a while since my last update (and, as I don't want to leave my favorite stalkers hanging for fear of a Misery style punishment), I will document things.

School work: Yeah, believe it or not, I've actually had to do work. I guess the way it works over here is the profs like to lull people into a false sense of security, during which many stop attending lectures...or doing readings...or handing in assignments...and then they pile on the workload and terrify everyone into studying again by giving sample material to prepare for exams (during which many realize that they have no idea what's going on in the class or what their prof's name is...). Don't worry, I'm too much of a nerd to be one of these people.

Weather: Did you know that Ireland actually does receive sunlight? With the amount of fake tan I've seen since being here, I didn't believe it, but it actually gets WARM and SUNNY here. Like the past 2-3 weeks, I've actually been able to go outside a few times without a coat on, and wear SUNGLASSES, and even SHORTS. I was afraid that being out of Philly meant that I would miss the proper smell of spring and those random days where it hits 70 degrees and suddenly everyone is lying on College Green in bikinis. And yeah, it's not quite the same here (because the second a cloud moves over the sun, you start to get the chills), but it's close enough.

Lacrosse: So this past Friday and Saturday, the UCD women's lacrosse team had informal matches. These matches included a mix of players from Dublin, Belfast, Galway, and other places which I don't remember. What you should know about this is that these random players, and about a third of the UCD team are on the Irish Development team...meaning they're going to be representing Ireland in the Women's Lacrosse WORLD CUP. As the cocky American that I am, I figured that this Irish team would probably be a bit of a joke in comparison to teams I've seen back home. NEWS UPDATE: They're actually really good and beat the American team a few years ago...

So the way the teams were split up, it was the National Irish Team versus everyone else (so they could practice playing together with the new players who just made the squad). Sadly for me, I was on the everyone else team. As in the team on which the players run the wrong direction of the goal. And can't catch. Or throw. Or pick up the ball off the ground once they've missed the catch or dropped the throw. Needless to say, we were massacred. Even though I wanted to yell at everyone at half time, it was still fun(ish).

This week we have a three day long tournament called Dublinfest, which means we miss class and play three games a day on Tuesday and Wednesday, and the winning teams from those games play in a final match on Thursday. I think we have a shot, especially since we won't be losing 99% of our GOOD players to the Irish Team.

Social life: I take it from the conversation I had with my grandmother just an hour ago that it's possible that there's some gossip in this department. "This department" specifically being my (I actually cringe a little when I hear these words) "love life." Yes, I am now dating an Irish boy. His name is Jason. He's on the guy's lacrosse team, which is how I met him. He is very nice. And he has won the love of my roommates by bringing an Xbox to our apartment. Don't worry, I told him I would only marry him if there is a shooting star directly behind him when he proposes.

Stay tuned for the Dublinfest update...and next weekend's trip to LDN!

How Protestant Countries Do Things.

Part 1: Belfast

Yes, Northern Ireland is a different country than The Republic of Ireland. Which means four things:

1. They are part of the UK and not the EU. So...they're loyal to British monarchs.
2. Since they're not part of the EU, I had to use pounds instead of euros as currency. So...no matter how low any prices looked, my American dollar was even more WORTHLESS.
3. Since they're loyal to British monarchs, the majority of the population is Protestant. So...there's kind of a beef between them and the Catholics.
4. Their accents are really impossible to understand once you're used to the Dublin accent.

Anyway, from what I understand, Belfast is a really nice city. However, I was there for a weekend with the lacrosse team, so all I actually saw was the bus station, the hostel where we stayed, a lacrosse field, and a few pubs. Ooooops.

It was fun though. A lot of bonding. A full Saturday of lacrosse from 10am - 3:30pm. After which many libations were poured, served, and consumed. It was grand.

Part 2: Edinburgh

The great thing about Scotland is that it's only an hour long flight from the Dublin airport. The sad thing about the Dublin airport is RyanAir airlines. Which are cheap. Though only at ungodly hours of the morning like 6:25am. This being the situation, my roommate/wingman/protective brother Joe and I decided to stay awake to wait for our 4am cab instead of go to bed and wake up at 4am. We did this by eating a normal dinner, taking a nap, and waking up at midnight to eat another round of dinner. I still don't know how we're not fat...

Anyway, our flight out went well, and we landed in Scotland, which had a warm friendly welcoming layer of icy snow on the ground. Awesome. Luckily, when we got into town where our hostel was, there wasn't anymore snow. But it was nippy. It reminded me of home (sigh). Unfortunately, check-in at Budget Backpackers Hostel (hahaha....story of my life) wasn't until five hours after we had arrived. So after having mild heart attacks, we ate some hostel breakfast (by that I mean we ate 5 croissants each) and ventured out to do touristy things (take pictures of landmarks to prove to our mothers that we did something in Europe besides drink).

We hit up Edinburgh's #1 attraction, the castle. It was expensive, but really worth it. The castle itself was architecturally impressive and the view of the city from the top was amazing (see pictures - I hate describing things). We even spent the extra 3 pounds for the audio tour, which was actually pretty nice. The castle also has the Scottish National War Museum (I could be making that name up) inside it, and the Scottish Crown Jewels were on display in the castle as well. I wish I was allowed to take pictures, but I wasn't, so I guess I'll have to describe those. Basically, just picture a sword so big that if you held it above your head for a minute, your arm would be useless to you for the rest of the week. And there was a crown encrusted with gems and pearls. And there was a scepter which was really small (because all your focus has to be on holding that ridiculous sword). And there was a rock. No, I'm not kidding, it's called the Stone of Destiny. It's been used at all the Scottish (and then British for obvious reasons...) coronations since at least 1057. Apparently medieval people thought the rock had Biblical significance, and why not just keep pretending and carrying on the tradition, right?

After admiring these "Honours of Scotland," we left the castle and walked a bit down the Royal Mile, which leads down to the palace. Things we noticed while walking this chunk of mile:

• A really pretty cathedral that had been turned into a cafe...I didn't realize how Catholic I was until I found myself mildly offended (it was Ash Wednesday, and I didn't sleep. I was cranky and not in Dublin anymore).
• A lot of stores with cashmere. I guess I'm a savage because I really had no idea that was like, a Scottish thing.
• The Elephant House Cafe, where J.K. Rowling wrote Harry Potter (well...this one was just off the road, but I'm still counting it).

When we got to the point of whiny bitch exhaustion, we stopped at a Subway, hid our shameful American food in our jackets, and returned to the hostel. Still an hour too early to check-in. So after eating our shameful American food in the public space of the kitchen (and falling asleep with our heads on the table), we were finally able to get into our room. Where we slept until 6pm. FIVE HOUR NAP FTW.

After a classy dinner of frozen pizza and garlic bread from the convenience store (all a total of 5 pounds, so complete SHIT), we joined a group from our hostel for a pub crawl. I will not discuss the pub crawl....mostly because I don't really remember any of it. But I do know the drinkage was cheap because I still had money when I woke up the next day!

Like the Cork City pub crawl in Ireland, the Budget Backpackers Edinburgh pub crawl did not help me want to wake up and go sight-seeing. Actually, we slept until 3 the next day. Oooops again. But we were able to get out, drink smoothies, and check out the cemetery and the palace at the end of the Royal Mile, the queen's official residence when she stays in Scotland. As goes the story of my life (again), the palace was closed by the time we got there. But I saw some of the outside of it...(sorry Momatron).

The touristy highlight of this day was dinner. We dove in and tried the haggis, which actually doesn't look scary at all, and tastes better than it looks. I found it a satisfying meal, but to be honest, I really would not go out of my way to eat it again (I know, shameful American). After dinner, we once again joined the group for the pub crawl. Despite our pact to take it easy this time, we both ended up even worse off than the previous night. I guess the people we were with either found us very lovable or the drinks were just DIRT cheap, because people just kept buying us shots...rumor has it that at some point on the walk in between bars, I started screaming "GUYS I CAN'T SEE ANYMORE." But I don't remember that so I bet it's not true.

Anyway, we survived the night (by this I mean I didn't get arrested or try to fight anyone, and Joe did not get killed as a result of me trying to fight anyone) and by some strange voodoo we made it back to the hostel (I'm pretty sure God did not want to be involved in that sloppiness).

The next day was the day from HELL (see, I told you God had NO PART IN THIS). We made it to the airport in good time for our 12:40pm flight, and then got delayed FIVE HOURS because of "technical issues." Word to the wise - no matter how cheap they are, don't fly with RyanAir. I am telling you from personal experience, and the grumblings of the other veteran passengers, IT IS NOT WORTH IT.

We did eventually get back to Dublin. I missed Ireland. But I can't lie, Edinburgh knows how to get the craic on.

Drummylicious Visit

This past weekend, I had the wonderful joy of hosting a visit from my fabulous friend, Caitlin, who came from London. There was plenty of craic to go around, which was good because I finally have work now at UCD, and I needed a nice weekend. I actually had to turn in two essays this past week, and I've got two more due this week. Let me take a brief moment to just share some things my professors have taught me about essay-writing here:

• You are not supposed to plagiarize.
• You are supposed to have a thesis statement, topic sentences, and quotes from the text as evidence of your point.
• Essays will be accepted until two weeks after the due date has passed (at a loss of half a grade a day).

I do not consider myself to be a snob, or a particularly judgmental human being, but HONESTLY. Back at Penn, if you hand in you essay two HOURS after the deadline, good luck trying to get a professor to accept it. No, no, wait. two MINUTES with some profs I've had. Two weeks? REALLY? Don't even get me started on the thesis thing.

Ok, English major rant over. Back to my weekend.

So on Friday night, Caitlin met my friends and we all happily feasted at the apartment. I then gave her some cultural education (by this I mean taught her Irish slang and made her listen to what in my opinion should be the Irish National Anthem. Here's the link, but don't listen if you're in public unless you have headphones http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ljPFZrRD3J8). After I finished mentally preparing Caitlin, we all went out in a group to Purty Kitchen, a poorly named nightclub. It was a bit dead since a lot of Irish people went home to their non-Dublin counties to vote (I hope since the elections are over people will take down the posters of the politician who looks like Mr. Burns from the Simpsons...), but we were rolling 11 playas deep, so we brought the party anyway.

On Saturday, Caitlin and I took the bus into city center and then walked like 23985739451934 miles to the Guinness Storehouse, which despite being an iconic Dublin landmark, is way off in a shady ugly area of the city. It was grand though, I now know a lot more than I really need to know about Guinness. I must, however, share my favorite fun fact. Arthur Guinness, the founder of the brewery, fought off cops with a pickax to defend his somewhat illegally obtained water supply (which is not, like people say, from the River Liffey, but from the Wicklow Mountain springs). Apparently it worked out pretty well for him...

Though the nicest part of the storehouse is actually the Gravity Bar at the very top. No, it's not what you think, I don't say that because of the beer, but because it shows a 360 degree panoramic view of Dublin. It just so happened that the sun shone ALL DAY, so it was absolutely magnificent.

Anyway, after enjoying our tour/Guinness drinking, we walked around the city a bit. I gave Caitlin some more cultural orientation by taking her to Supermac's, which is the Irish version of McDonald's. They really like to advertise the fact that their beef is 100% Irish. Like, they REALLY want you to know it's not that crap with mad cow disease.

When we finally admitted defeat to exhaustion, we returned to UCD for another home-cooked dinner. And then went out to Porterhouse, a reputable pub. Unfortunately, grenades were exploding everywhere (if you don't understand, watch the Jersey Shore and EDUCATE yourself), and the house beer (which was cheapest) was quite foul. And I can put up with a lot of rubbish, believe me. Luckily, we still had a nice large crowd so all was not lost. We got home, ate an unnecessary amount of food, and went to bed.

Great weekend, now back to work =( Good thing spring break is THIS COMING WEEKEND!!!

Life Goes On

This post is purely for selfish purposes. By this I mean I have an essay due in 38 hours, I'm 1,400 out of 2,500 words into it, and I can't bear to look at it right now. So, thinking of some advice from my old creative writing professor, I will use this as a 'writing exercise.' Meaning it'll probably be fun for me and boring for you. Sorry.

Now, on the off chance you've actually committed to reading this evening's rubbish (sucker), you're probably wondering what the heck I've been doing since my last update. I mean, I'm in Ireland. I must be making fun/interesting/cultural/historic discoveries every single day. Well....yes, I have, but they are all small things. Actually, you know what, the little things deserve attention too. I should know, I work with kids (who I miss TERRIBLY).

Here are some of my 'Happy Meal' sized observations and experiences:

1) Besides saying "grand", Irish people tend to say "cheers" rather than "thanks." I like that too, but I've been irrevocably conditioned to say "thanks" so that one won't catch on for me unfortunately.

2) Despite whatever anyone tries to tell you, Irish people change the context of "craic" like every time they say it, so I'm terrified to use it. It supposedly means "happiness" or "good times" or some such thing, and it's pronounced "crack", not "crake." Like honestly, what would you think if I walked up to you and said, "Yo, how about that craic (crack) last night? It was off the hook, no?" That would just be sketch. I think the rule is you're only allowed to say it if you have an Irish accent.

3) A D4 is a girl who straightens her hair, teases it until it's a good 5 inches above her head, wears make-up that doesn't match her complexion, and 4 inch heels that she can't walk in.

4) I joined the lacrosse team here. Half of them smoke cigarettes immediately before practice. I thought that was bad...until one girl walked off the field while we were doing sprints, just so she could take a few drags of her friend's cig. Then it was just SHAMEFUL.

5) Domino's is the highest quality pizza over here. It's like 30 euro for a large two topping pie.

6) Irish people don't actually like U2. And they absolutely HATE Bono.

Trinity College (aka the school in Dublin where the "smart" people go...)

Since I only have one class on Fridays, I usually like going into town and just walking around. This past Friday, I finally went to see Trinity College, which is well-known for its library and the Book of Kells. This book is considered a great work of art from the Dark Ages. It was written by Irish monks somewhere around 700-800 AD, and it contains the four Gospels and beautiful illustrations. The exhibit also contains various other rare manuscripts, all of which are really amazing when you think about all the work that went into creating them. I mean really, some dudes spent years of their lives painstakingly transcribing religious texts onto calf skin, making sure each letter was perfectly formed. It's crazy.

After seeing the book, you exit through "The Long Room." I wish they allowed pictures to be taken, because it looked like the library from Disney's Beauty and the Beast. The roof had to be raised to fit all of the books. I felt like just standing in there made me smarter. It was nerd HEAVEN.

Yeah Cork Yeah

Presently, I'm too exhausted to be charming and witty. But I have to update this thingy.

So the Erasmus international student group that I mentioned in an earlier post plans trips to major cities in Ireland. Meaning I don't have to do the work and plan it myself. Win. This past weekend, 200 of us went to Cork city, which is on the southwestern side of Ireland. We left on Friday morning, and took a long annoying bus ride (our driver wouldn't shut up to let us sleep, and he wasn't even clever or funny to make up for it) to Cobh, which is a town about half an hour away from Cork. It was scenic, with a harbor and a pretty cathedral. But the weather was dreadful. I'm not even talking rain (I LOVE rain now), I'm talking wind that can blow a side-view mirror clear off a coach bus...which is ACTUALLY what happened while we were on the highway. So we spent a good deal of time in the cathedral and getting food instead of walking around.

We then arrived in Cork at about...5pm? Yes. And we stayed in the Kinlay House hostel. I wasn't prepared for this, but in order to shower, I had to hold down a button (like those sinks in public bathrooms) and keep pressing it if I wanted a steady flow or water. Which, by the way, never got hot. As a matter of fact, it was pleasant if it reached lukewarm temperature. But it's cool that's what student traveling is ABOUT. The nonsense that you'll deal with to save some $$$

That night, after dinner at Luigi Malone's (an Irish Italian restaurant if you can't tell by that awesome name), we went out for a Pub Crawl. Now, in Dublin, they have special guided pub crawls that feature music or literary history. Our pub crawl in Cork was guided by the leaders of the Erasmus group, and it featured drinking. In four different pubs. I don't remember their names, but I can tell you that one of them had a huge screen and only showed rugby games on it, and another one looked like a log cabin and played metal the whole time. The other two apparently didn't make an impression on me.

Unfortunately, after this sort of pub crawl, people are generally useless the next day. As in sleeping til 12:30 and then being afraid to go outside because the wind sounds like 1000 dying baby foxes. But of course, we eventually forced ourselves to brave the ugly weather and walk about town a bit. Sadly, Cork city isn't really known for it's museums like Dublin, so we just ended up checking out two decently famous churches, St. Anne's and North Cathedral. After taking enough pictures to satisfy our tourist consciences, we went back a slept more...since that night we were promised reduced entry price and a couple free drinks at a club (priorities). It was grand.

Sunday we left the city to come back to Dublin, but not before stopping a few hours at the Blarney Castle. This was really the highlight of the trip. The castle was amazing. The grounds and gardens were gorgeous. Even in the dark cloudy rain, I could not resist walking around outside the whole time.

Oh yeah, and I kissed the Blarney Stone. Let me tell you what this entails.

1) You have to walk up these very narrow, steep, winding tower stairs. Been to the top of the Statue of Liberty? Yeah those stairs have got NOTHING on these ones.

2) You have to walk around the top of the castle, over some nice safe not deadly at all SLIPPERY MEDIEVAL ROCKS.

3) A man yells at you to turn around, sit on a soggy mat, and lean your body backwards while he holds you upside down over the edge of the castle to kiss the bloody rock.

4) Some other man yells at you to take a ticket to spend 10 euro on the awkward picture he took of you struggling to contort your body, wondering if you're fully ok with the old grumpy guy touching your waist.

But all discomfort and confusion aside, it really was GRAND.

Random Events that Have Little or Nothing to Do with Ireland, Besides the Fact that They Took Place in Ireland

As I have been trying to accept the fact that I no longer sleep at night, and haven't had any fun traveling stories, I have neglected my blogging.

Let me take this moment to apologize. Sorry blog.

And in accordance with Peter's request that I write something, under imminent threat of receiving ugly foot pictures on my facebook page, I will take the time now to document all the nonsense that will undoubtedly make me seem like "a great coxcomb" or, more unfortunately, a "sawce-box" (for more information on these terms, which are regarded by dictionary.com as obsolete, see the works of Jane Austen and/or Samuel Richardson).

1) SUPERFLIRT - aka how my flatmates and I have occupied ourselves in the living room.

Our mysterious roommate Katie has by far been the most important member of our humble abode, as she has provided us with the unfailing joy of Tracey Cox's masterpiece, Superflirt. Written by the former editor of the ever witty and profound Cosmopolitan magazine, Superflirt provides both men and women with advice on how to flirt successfully. This entails reading body language and sending the right signals.

I will not spoil this great literary gem for you (if it can be found at the Boston College library, I'm sure it exists elsewhere), but I will say that the tidbits of wisdom that Ms. Cox includes ARE THE REASONS WHY MEN ALWAYS SEEM TO FIND HIDDEN "COME AND GET ME" SIGNALS THAT FEMALES HAVE ZERO INTENTION OF SENDING. I will not even discuss what she says about lip gloss...

2) Class

It's all grand, except for my Modern American Lit class. For anyone who has NEVER been my roommate, I will just spit it straight. I have zero tolerance for literature in which every word apparently has some "deep meaning." Consequently, modernist literature is NOT my style. If anyone understands what the heck Faulkner's The Sound and the Fury is about, please call me and let me know. I don't know if Sparknotes can even help me survive through this one...

3) Nighttime Excursions - aka clubbing

I'm going to do a brief sum up for this...all of these stories are better when I get to re-enact them with appropriate bodily gestures and varying voice inflections.

Dicey's - hid in a bathroom stall for 10 minutes avoiding creepers.

D2 - almost got into a fight (coming from the firm pacifist who throws herself between angry young men to break up fights at parties)

Button Factory - shook the hand of an actor I've never heard of (anyone seen the show 'Skins'? Apparently it's HUGE over here...)

21 - got kissed by a girl...and did NOT like it (sorry Katy Perry, no judgment)

After all the nonsense, I have survived mostly unscathed (nothing a little therapy can't fix). If anything, I now have enough material to write a horrible screenplay for a cliche teen movie.

Stay tuned, I will have REAL things to share after my trip to Cork this coming weekend =)

I DID THINGS.

Before I begin narrating my fabulous weekend, I will do a quick run through of people who I hang out with, so I can make my life easier and just refer to them by name in my writing. Here it goes:

• Joe - American study abroad student from California. Studies at Haverford back home.
• Fiona - Swiss study abroad student. A little older...though by that I mean she's only 23.
• Katie - American study abroad student from NY. Studies at Boston College...and we hardly ever see her.
• Guy - Irish student. Senior at UCD. Loves China.
• Emma - Irish student. Freshman at UCD. Works as a nurse. Always happy.
• Lauren - American study abroad student from Wisconsin. Studies at Bryn Mawr College.
• Rick - American study abroad student from Connecticut. Studies at Temple. Loves music. Bakes awesome cookies.

The first 5 are my roommates, and the last two are other people that hang out with us. Ok, back to the story.

So Friday night, the roomies and I spent hours eating an ungodly amount of Chinese food. If you are wondering (like Momatron), yes they have Chinese food here. It is pretty much the same as back home. Now, be embarrassed for asking.

Then Saturday, being well-fed and regenerated by a glorious night of sleep, I met up with Rick to go on a day trip to Howth. Howth (rhymes with growth, not mouth) is a little fishing town 25 minutes north of Dublin on the Dart train. It was grand.

Basically we spent hours walking along a hiking trail through the cliffs. Yes, cliffs. As in those green rocky projections sticking out of oceans that you see in movies filmed in Ireland. It was UNREAL. I'm definitely going back when it gets warmer to take a boat around the area. Again, lacking the amount of talent it takes to describe the landscape, you can check out my pictures on facebook, and I will soon be putting all of them on Snapfish (so don't worry).

After a breathtaking walk (both in the "everything is gorgeous" sense and the "omg I can't walk another step" sense), we decided to hit up an eating establishment for some sustenance. And, as Howth is well known for its quality fresh fish, we both ordered a HUGE plate of fish and chips...and some calamari as an appetizer. All of which was well worth the 810101380283 calories.

Of course, following a 5 hour venture with a gigantic meal resulted in a food coma when I got back home. Which was grand.

Erasmus and Family Dinner

Update since my last blog...which is difficult because my internet goes in and out every couple of hours.

Classes so far seem great. One in particular, called "The Narrative Art" is about Irish folklore. All we did this week was listen to our professor tell us stories. I hope I'm not jinxing myself, but I may have hit the jackpot with this one.

In other news, here at UCD, there is an international students society (just like most other schools) called the Erasmus Student Network. They host events on and off-campus so that we can all meet each other and talk about how sad we get when we miss our professors' jokes on account of their heavy accents and rapid rate of speech. Anyway, on Wednesday night (which is apparently the Irish equivalent of "Thirsty Thursday" back home), they held an event at a nice(ish) but kinda lame(ish) club called Dicey's. It wasn't bad. We got a private bus to go there, and a private room to check our coats...other than that there wasn't anything special about this event...haha.

The night was okay(ish). The place had this outdoor space in the middle of it called "The Garden", which was kind of like a courtyard I guess, where there were two bars, a dance floor, and plenty of room to smoke (Irish people smoke A LOT). Unfortunately, after passing the majority of the evening in this section, I came home STINKING. I know. Even outside, the sheer quantity of cigarette odor found its way into my freshly washed hair and clothes. Yucky.

Anyway, on Thursday I only had two classes, so I was able to get all my work done during the day. It was AMAZING. I wish I could live like that back at Penn (where working until 1am is early, 12am is nice, and 11pm is UNHEARD OF). Thursday evening was fabulous. My roommates and I had another family dinner. I brought America to dinner...we made Juicy Lucys. For those who have not heard of this DELICIOUS invention, it's simply a hamburger with cheese stuffed in the middle, so that it oozes out when you bite into it (and makes you look exceedingly unattractive). We, of course, also had to add cheese on top of them. But only to glue down the fried onions and mushrooms. Priorities matter.

Oh no this is becoming a food blog again. Sorry.

Stay tuned, I'll (hopefully) be adding in my weekend adventures on Sunday night!

Black Monday and Get Your Ass to Class Tuesday

So Monday was the first official day of classes at UCD. I only had one (at 9am...) because I still had to register for two more classes to have a full course load here (which is 6 classes. GAH). My first class was just a "tutorial" (we would call it a recitation back home) for my Modern American Literature class, which is in a HUGE lecture hall for about 200 something students. It's STRANGE.

Anyway, directly after that I had to go to the international coordinator's office so that she could finish my registration.

I got there at 9:50am. The line ahead of me was HIDEOUS.

I waited until 1:00pm...and then she went on an hour long lunch break.

I finally got my turn at 3:30ish pm. And left at 4:00pm. It was NOT a nice day.

So I got back to my room and ate some dinner, and while talking to my Irish flatmate, found out that it was "Black Monday." At UCD, this means that the second the students get out of class, they go to the student bar (yes...there's a bar on the campus. They also sell wine at the campus convenience store) and get black-out drunk. And then go out to real bars and presumably black out even more.

Although I would typically be all over embracing these native traditions, I chose to stay in and hang out with my Irish roomie (who is a senior, and therefore finds less novelty in Black Friday "activities") and his friends who came over. We drank beer and watched "Are You Afraid of the Dark?" As they say in Ireland, it was GRAND.

When my other roomies got in around 10ish, they joined us. Apparently the festivities at the student bar were getting to embarrassment and/or barbarian level. I hear that the floor was covered in beer by 9pm, and that people were puking into their beer glasses by 10pm...(what a shame I missed the fun)

So today (Tuesday), I went to a few more classes. My first was European Art, which should be fun, since I like Europe and art. I also had my lecture for 20th Century Drama, and I'm pretty excited for that because the reading list looks great.

After buying the necessary books for homework, I got back home and had a family dinner with one of my flatmates and a girl who lives in the apartment below us. It took us like 40 minutes to prepare this meal...which was only pasta, meat sauce, and sauteed vegetables (we blame the burners. It literally takes 20 minutes for water to boil on our stove). Luckily, everything turned out well so dinner was also GRAND.

I love saying that.

UCD

This post will include Thursday, Friday, and Saturday since I didn't do very much.

Thursday

In the morning, I got to University College Dublin nice and early, and met up with some other study abroad students to wait for the campus tour that was scheduled at 10am.

But nobody ever came to take us on the tour =(

So we all had to wait an hour and a half to go to an orientation meeting. So from 11:30am-3:10pm, I attended various information sessions (which unfortunately didn't inform me of much more than what I had already received in e-mails before getting here).

Later on though, I met up with Momatron and Gigi again in the city center (I keep wanting to call it Center City...oh Philly!) and we went to the other famous theater, The Abbey Theater to see a play in the evening. "Arrah-na-Pogue" was (as its title sounds) very Irish, and was excellent! That is saying a lot because it was a romantic comedy...and you know how I feel about those. Anyway, unlike Hollywood's most embarrassing genre, this play was witty, with some playful jabs at Britain, and the scenery was very impressive. It made me feel very cultured.

Friday

After saying goodbye to mom & grandma, I came back to UCD to finally finish moving in. Once I did, I took a four hour nap (I wasn't lying when I said I haven't done much). I met almost all of my "flatmates" and they all seem friendly.

Saturday

I slept in, started my day off with the breakfast of champions (a banana with peanut butter, and Ramen noodles...though my roomie did put an egg in it, so it was totally a real meal), and went on my first grocery shopping expedition. I took the bus back into the city center, and actually spent a reasonable amount of money on food! Hurray for not starving =D

Going Down South

Today we went on a Wicklow day tour to see the countryside to the south of Dublin. I had to add our tour guide/bus driver Stephen to my "loves of my life" list because he was nerdy-looking, witty, and hilarious, and disgustingly Irish. He took us down the coast line, past Howth (which apparently has the best fresh sea food in Dublin), past the Irish version of Hollywood (Bono and Enya live there...), and out to the Glendalough area (which means "valley of two rivers" in Gaelic, to anyone who may doubt my purely academic reasons for coming here ;]).

So I will let the pictures do most of the landscape describing because that is honestly not my strength as a writer, and I could not by any means do justice to the places I've seen. I will however mention some of the interesting things that Stephen (love of my life) told us.

• The open land is uninhabited because it is made up of peat bog, which is 90% water and therefore not exactly the most stable base for a house



• Dead bodies of warriors killed 2,000 ago were preserved with hair, nails, and skin were discovered in the bogs only a few decades ago (sorry, I find slightly morbid things fascinating)



• Guiness Lake was named as such because it's in the shape of a pint glass, and the Irish added a buttload of sand on one of the banks to make it look like the foam head (I love alcoholics)



• Pretty much every movie with beautiful landscape scenes was filmed in this area (Stephen mentioned more recent ones like Braveheart, Excalibur, P.S. I Love You, and Leap Year)

In addition to all the breath-taking places I saw, today was a very Irish food day too (I swear I'm not trying to make this a food blog, but this is ME + EATING we're talking about). During our trip, we took a lunch break at a pub in Glendalough, where we ate Irish Stew (beef, beef, beef, beef, carrots, carrots, onion) and dranks some more Guiness. OH, and the lovely Stephen provided us with some shots of Jameson Whiskey (which I actually LOVED, despite my previous feelings concerning whiskey...especially the kind packaged in single serve plastic pouches). And finally, when we got back to the Dublin city center, mother and I went to Breshoff's to eat the "alledgedly" (that's Stephen's favorite word) best fish & chips in the city. I can say in all honesty that I would gladly eat beer battered deep fried cod and fries every day if I wouldn't die of a heart attack in a week.

Basically, day three = GREAT SUCCESS.

***ALSO**** If you want to see more pictures, I'm putting them all up on Facebook so check them out!!!

Recovered and Ready to Go

After a long night of sleeping, randomly waking up, and being confused as to my whereabouts, I started the day with a "traditional Irish breakfast" (yes that's actually what these people call it), which can be translated into "meat plate."

Eggs, ham, bacon, sausage, white "pudding", black "pudding, baked beans, toast, a grilled tomato, and tea. -------------------->

After demolishing this meal (if you know me, you shouldn't doubt that I am very capable of doing this), I went to see my dorm and then went shopping across the Liffey with mom and grandma. Would you believe it? The sun shined the whole day. Meaning we were able to shop all day. We had our post-adventure dinner at Mssrs Maguire, a bar in which I lost my Guiness virginity. It washed down my "100% Irish beef" cheeseburger and side of "chips" beautifully. I felt so IRISH.

We ended the day by going to the famous (and pretty small, surprisingly) Gate Theater to see Jane Eyre. It was a brilliant adaptation of the book and the acting was AMAZING. Like, the young girl who played Jane as a child would shake her head in disgust at our Disney Channel people. I'm definitely not a theater junkie but the performance honestly blew my mind.

In short...DAY 2 FOR THE WIN.

The Journey/Day 1

Hellooooooo Dublin! I'm here and I've accepted that I won't have a good hair day EVER while I'm here. In the words of Patches quoting Al Pacino in that ridiculous movie: "Ooooh rah."

Anyway, after waiting in the delightfully festive and welcoming JFK airport for, oh about 5 fun-filled hours, and sitting on the spacious Aer Lingus plane with no crying babies whatsoever (haha uh huh yeah right), I stepped out and took my first breath of Irish air. It was DELICIOUS. No really, like Kyle's water. It was damp, cool, and smelled WONDERFUL (aka the complete opposite of the undoubtedly contaminated farty air plane air).

AND the sun shone for me. Just try to tell me that was a coincidence.

So after getting only 2 hours of sleep and running around doing official study abroad things, I'm obviously grumpy and tired, so please don't judge me for my grouchy complaining and lack of decent writing. I promise I'll do better.

Here are today's important/fun/Welch observations:

• During the taxi ride from the air port to the hotel, we passed 2 MacDo's & 1 BK in two blocks. I'M HOME.


• Irish people are the absolute winners at being friendly, approachable, and helpful.


• The size of the tv in our room is honestly hilarious. I don't mean that in the snobby "I expected better than this" kinda way. I mean, like when you walk into an American hotel, everything can be mediocre, cramped, and dingy, but you can count on having at LEAST a 30'' wide tv screen. This one...well...my laptop may be bigger than it...AGAIN. I'M HOME.


• I will lose about 20 lbs living at UCD because ALL the buildings are legitimately 900000 miles apart. Like seriously. <---(*hint*that's for you Pete)

Again, I promise tomorrow's post won't be this lazy. Love you all & miss you already!

The Warm Up (to the real blogging)

So, as I promised, I will be documenting my foreign shenanigans by blogging...which is not something I would typically do, but it's the easiest way for me to avoid retelling all my stories via skype & e-mail. And I am generally a fan of doing less work.

Also, by “warm up” I mean I’m still in the US. Which means that this won’t be exciting or particularly witty yet (here’s hoping that these allegedly witty Dubliners will give me some skills). So I will use this time to give EVERYONE shout outs, to make up for the lack of formal goodbyes to some folks and just because I like shouting people out and giving ‘em some love. Here it goes:

To Momatron - Thanks for letting me leave the country! Good luck living with Dan and Caroline without me =p

To Patches - Remember to shave your face, child.

To Caroline - Please continue to watch the Jersey Shore. Just because I’ll be away doesn’t mean I won’t appreciate your frighteningly accurate impersonations of “the Situation” creepin in night clubs.

To Pop & Gigi - Stay golden.

To T.G. - Stay stylish.

To Padre - I promise not to eat a live goldfish.

To Uncle G & your beautiful clan - I promise I’m not dead and I WILL see you EVENTUALLY.

To Cousin Friend & Marisol - This may be premature, but CONGRATULATIONS.

To the Cuskley clan - I’ll bring back MANY pictures of the homeland =]

To The Sewing Circle - Please don’t forget the Shamrock Shake tradition just because I’m not home.

To my beautiful Penn ladies - I challenge you all to TRY to fb stalk me as much as I’ll stalk you all =p

To Peteyyyyy - Give pookie a hug for me! <3

To everyone else I should shout out (but I won’t because I’m a lazy ass American) - PEACE.